doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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