Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
