dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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