Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Your penis caused this!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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