It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
