Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
