I didn't shave. On purpose
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
