Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
