she kept yelling 'call me bella'
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
