She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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