she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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