And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
