she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
