You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
