Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
How does one acquire holy water?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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