Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.

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(949): View more from California

who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool

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(765): View more from Indiana

It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.

(1-765): View more from Indiana

Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.

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(315): View more from New York

I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"

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(859): View more from Kentucky

She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...

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(936): View more from Texas

I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect

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