just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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