my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
