i just google imaged poop.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
