After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
