when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
