physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize