bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
