I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
