I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Be still, my beating vagina.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Randomize