this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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