My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
