I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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