I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Floor bacon is actually really good
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
