I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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