My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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