She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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