wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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