Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize