Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Randomize