I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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