Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
