this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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