I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
