Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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