Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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