Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
