i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
