Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
