I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
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