The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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