"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Don't make out with my wife yet
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
