My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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