I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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