lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
